Hi. I'm Darin. You may know me from all the grain information I bring you on DTN and the Rural Radio Network...but what you might not know, is that I am a stone cold ladies man.

I mean, its obvious once you look at me that the ladies can't resist the tempting charm that immediately intoxicates them the moment they spot me in all the hottest night clubs. I give off a vibe that just oozes lovin' as I sit in the corner sending drinks to all the ladies that catch my eye.  None can resist.

Don't believe me? Fine. What do I care? You and your boys can stand over there with your cheap beer in hand getting a good chortle at your percieved notions of my savvy or lack thereof. Meanwhile, I'll be over here romancing your girlfriend with a bottle of Courvosier and the poetry of John Mayer.

Ok. Fine. I'll give you an example of my prowess...One particular weekend years ago, I found myself in a small bar off the beaten path. The DJ was providing hot beats, the furnace was providing high heats, and the ladies were providing the hot scenery. After a few cocktails, I made my way over to a buxom young lass whom had caught my fancy. I offered to buy her a drink. I could tell right away that this was the sensitive, young type who would be thrilled by the poetry of a dark, mysterious, yet intoxicating man who strolls up to them.

She ordered something I had never heard of, but I gladly obliged her taste, and spared no expense to get the drink for the object of that night's affection. I invited her to my corner table where we conversed about many topics including but not limited to: my experiences fighting bears in the Great Northwest, my ability to speak 13 languages including one I made up, and how the Dos Equis guy is a loose interpretation of my life.

I waited for my moment. She was falling into a state of bliss. I could tell that I needed to recite the perfect line in order to make her mine. I recited a haiku so beautiful, that she had no choice but to fall into a lover's embrace with me...

Price of corn rises
Like the heat of our passion
Markets are Bullish.

What happens next? Well...a gentleman wouldn't tell and a friend...would never ask.

Until next time,

--D-Love